Andromeda in Chains

This whole time I’ve been struggling to find something real. I’ve been pushing and shoving against this feeling in one way or another. I know it’s a lack of acceptance again. It’s so hard to accept it. I know it’s a kind of rejection again. I lose my patience.

What what do you want from me now? I’ve already let go of my dreams. I know I’m feeling sorry for myself but I can’t help it today of all the days. I’m really trying to be good about it, but I’m not being good about. I did try a little bit to be good about it, but I’ll be the first to admit I’m not being good about it.

I can feel the anger in the way I’m playing. I feel so frustrated at the way it’s been playing out. I just want to be free of the tyrant inside me. I’m tired of being trapped even though know that being trapped is the trap itself. How long can I resist? I guess I’m finding out.

You know I don’t want to resist. You know I want to assist you. You know I don’t want to resist. I don’t even want to exist. I just want to melt away in you. I want to get carried away in you. I want to be swept away be you. But I’m still on this rocky shore. I’m still stranded without you. You wash over me sometimes, but still it seems like most of the time I’m still trapped on my own rocky coast. I know you come sometimes but it still seems like most of the time I’m without you.

And when you warm me, it’s all ok again, but living without you, there’s no solace, and no sunshine. There’s no solace and no sunlight when you’re gone.

I’m Andromeda in chains. I’m Andromeda.

Just want to be overtaken by a very large wave of you. I wouldn’t mind drowning, if I knew I was drowning in you. I spent so much time building ways out, but I just want to go in now. Please take all my strategies from me, please take all my plans. Please take the whole outside world from me, please take these shifting sands.

I try to build structures on them and the structures fall, I acknowledge them all. I acknowledge the fall, I acknowledge the falling, I acknowledge it all. I just don’t want to be without you anymore. I just don’t want to be here without you down here anymore. I just don’t want to be without you down here anymore. Forgive me my weakness please, but I don’t want to be down here without you anymore.

Forgive me my weakness.

No one said that weakness is what’s going on. No one said that weakness is what this is about. No one used the word “weakness” before you. You think we don’t care, but that’s not exactly true. We care, we care, but we are the keepers of your higher intentions. And we won’t listen to something that we know is not true. You’re bearing witness to terrible things. It’s not a weakness if it hurts you!

There are times when you just need to be in it. To give it time to finish. You’re almost done, you just need to be in it. You just need to give it time to finish. It’s taking its time, but as you witness, it has a chance to move on.

You move it out of the time-stuck place and let it go on. We know feels long! It feels eternal. When you touch into a frozen static place, you’re feeling that pain that felt it was alone forever. You’re describing a quality of a place, of a pocket in time and space. And you feel into it, even though it hurts you, you’re letting it go. You’re giving it a body to be in. You’re lending it consciousness.

You’re giving it a body to be in so it can be processed by Life. You’re giving it a body to melt, a space for it to be in. A space for it to be processed in, and now it can go on. Now it can be done. Now the space is ended. Now that consciousness is free. Now that space is collapsed. Now that wound is healed. Now consciousness can flow there again. Now it’s reconnected.

Can you try to remember? The pain you’re feeling is that. It’s the pain of that space, it’s not you. You’re the space around that space. Remember, you’re space. Try to remember, darling.